The IT sector remains largely a male-dominated world. Although the situation is improving, women in technology face specific challenges that their male colleagues usually do not experience: impostor syndrome at a different intensity, transitioning into leadership with different obstacles, and the question of how to remain true to oneself in an environment with a different default setting.
As a coach who has worked in the IT environment for many years, I have had the opportunity to work with women on these topics. Here is what I found.
The con artist syndrome in IT: Different intensity, different roots
Impostor Syndrome affects women proportionally more than men in the IT sector. Research shows that while men typically apply for a position if they meet 60% of the requirements, women wait until they meet 90-100%.
In IT, impostor syndrome takes on a specific form: Technical competence is constantly verifiable.Anyone can come along and ask for details, a specific code or a particular algorithm. This creates constant pressure to prove competence, which is more intense for women in IT (who are in the minority).
A typical situation from practice
The client: a senior software engineer with 8 years of experience: felt inferior in meetings because "her colleagues speak with such confidence". In coaching we found: this colleague confidence was partly performance-based (actual competence), partly stylistic (they speak louder and with less hesitation, even when unsure). The client ultimately made the fewest errors in the entire team, but could not perceive this as proof of her competence.
How coaching helps with imposter syndrome
The coaching approach to imposter syndrome is not about "convincing yourself that you are good." It is systematic work on three levels:
- Collection of evidence: What exactly have I achieved in the last 6 months? (Not feelings, but facts.)
- Distinguishing between styles: Where do competence and self-presentation overlap? Confident conduct does not equal better results.
- Re-evaluation of the standard: By what standard am I judged? Is it my colleagues' standard or the results' standard?
Transitioning to a leadership role: Different challenges, different questions
Moving from a technical role to people management is a challenge for everyone, but for women in IT it brings specific additional questions. Most often I hear:
- I'm worried that if I take on a managerial role, people will stop seeing me as a technical expert.
- I don't know how to be an authority without having to be 'the tough boss'.
- I want to run things differently from what I see around me: but I don't know if that works in this culture.
These concerns are legitimate and specific to the context. Coaching is a space where they can be explored, without judgment and with the understanding that there is no single correct answer.
Leadership style that is yours: not one borrowed from men.
One of the most valuable areas I work on with women in managerial roles is identifying their own leadership style. Many women move into leadership positions and begin to imitate the role models they see around them (typically a more direct, male approach), and feel inauthentic.
Research consistently shows that leadership styles associated with women (empathy, inclusivity, shared decision-making) are statistically more effective in complex, creative organisations. The question is not "how to imitate a dominant style" but "how to find your own style and have confidence in it".
Assertiveness in an IT environment: How to be heard without "playing a role
In IT meetings, dynamics sometimes emerge where stronger voices dominate and others remain silent. Women in minority positions experience this more intensely: an objection raised by a woman is statistically less likely to be heard than the same objection from a man (see research by Susan Silbey and others).
It does not require you to become someone else. It requires finding ways of presenting yourself that suit you, while remaining effective in the given context.
Practical assertiveness techniques for an IT context
- Claim the space verbally: Before we move on, I'd like to return to point X": a clear signal that you have something to say.
- In advance vs. On-site: Share your perspective in advance for key meetings (via email or document), this will ease the dynamics of the meeting environment.
- Alliance: Build relationships with colleagues who support you and verbally affirm your contributions in discussions.
- Prepared responses for power outages: Let me finish my thought": short, calm, no apologies
Work-life integration: Specifics for women in IT
Work-life balance is a challenge for everyone. But women in IT, especially if they are mothers or caregivers, face an additional layer: expectations that remain asymmetrical for men and women. An IT career demands availability, continuous learning and flexibility. Caring for a family does too. Coaching in this context is not about finding the "right balance", that does not exist as a static state. It is about consciously setting priorities and boundaries at every stage of life.
The key coaching question is not "how do I balance my career and family" butWhat does a sufficiently good performance in both areas mean for me at this moment?- and where I have room for compromise and where I do not.
Coaching for women in IT: What to expect from collaboration
I work with women in the technology sector on the topics I described above, and others. The approaches I find most effective are:
- Working with facts and concrete situations (not abstract "self-development")
- Personal and professional lives are intertwined in an IT career.
- Without preconceived templates of "how a woman in IT should be". We seek what works for you.
- Respect for the technical environment. I understand the IT world, so we don't need to spend time explaining the context.
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